Stories: Adult Anecdotes (Mature)
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Clean house |
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We decided to put our house up for sale. We called the realtor and setup up a Saturday morning market analysis at 9:30 am. So Gayle and I both knew between our jobs we would have to get the house clean. We both were a little lazy all week getting it done. Gayle kinda waited to do her jobs,and we bickered alittle about who did what.
Saturday morning arrived and Gayle hurried around, doing her jobs,nude under a bathrobe.We were running out of time, before he did the analysis. She is a short women, and told me I needed to clean the cobwebs and dust off the ceiling fan.
I said "he will get over it." She got alittle upset and said " Do it yourself if you want it done." She pretty tick off by now. The realtor arrived, I greeted at the door and from there we walk around the outside of the house. Then we went in.Gayle was on a short step ladder, still in her robe,stretching upwards with her swiffer in one hand, and rotating the blades by hand to clean them.She hadn't realized that her swaying back and forth, her large boobs had bounced out of her robe. Both of them. We both just watch her for a moment or two. Then I said " Gayle." She looked pissed and and stop brushing.She said "what." I said" I think you should check your robe." She dropped the brush and covered up.
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Boyfriend out of town...Dark Alley open minded woman |
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So I've always been very open minded, and when my boyfriend was out of town for a week, I was very lonely and I was kinda of horny...SO i have a co-worker that I knew she was bisexual, and we got along pretty nice.. so I told her I was kinda Horny, she said she was to, so after we got of ( we got off at 9 PM) we went to the alley behind our office building, and we just started making out, one thing let to another and we started doing it in public, we we're having a good time, we we heard someone making weird noises... like Oohs and yeahs!!! but very low, so we Kept doing it, and then it happen again, it turns out that like 4 of our co-workers we're smoking pot behind the building at we're watching the whole thing since the beginning.... so stooped and they offered 400 to Keep going... we immediately told them they we're sick and Will only Kiss again for 200... The next day I quit my Job... and went to buy me some clothes with the 200 I had earned. And when My boyfriend came home we had a long sexaton... |
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small picture |
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My wife and I worked together years ago,and there was a small group of us that got along.Well the girls in the group got along real good and told each other everything.One of the girls were in a store where they carry birthday cards for adults.Such as a naked man with things blocking his private parts.Well the girls birthday was comming up so me and my wife thought we would have some fun.I got completely nude struck a pose on the floor and covered myself with a sign that said happy birthday.We used a fun size camera and it doesn't take big pictures{keep this in mind}Well after we took that picture I was already nude so the sign got thrown aside,and more private pictures were taken of me.Well the next day at work we give our friend a birthday card with the picture of me and my birthday suit and the birthday sign.She turned red but it was all in fun and nothing was exposed and we laughed.Then I see one of the other girls with small pictures in her hands.I then realize those are the ones of me completely naked.My wife thought this was hilarious,and I wasn't to embarrassed until her friend said "was it cold in the room".I felt my dick shrink in my pants.I tried to tell her that the picture was small.A week later I even brought a bigger picture in, she told me that no matter what I showed her i'd always be the co-worker with the tiny dick.I was so happy when that place went out of business.She still brings it up every time we see her. |
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A REAL Boob Story |
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This story happened many years ago when I was a sophomore in high school. Let's just say..I have always been on the bustier side. My boobs were a C-cup at that time. So there were rumors in school about my boobs being fake or that I stuffed my bra. There was a really cute guy (we’ll call him Ben here) that my two best friends and I had a crush on. One weekend, he threw a house party and had asked us to go. My friends and I were of course ecstatic. But when we got there, there was no one else there except for a couple of his friends. My friends and I were confused and thought that we had the wrong date. But they said that we had the correct date, and that they just wanted to have the party with just the six of us. So we chatted, ate, and danced. Afterwards, we all went upstairs to his room to hang out. After a while, Ben’s 2 friends had asked my 2 friends to go downstairs with them to grab us all some drinks. I was going to go down with them as well, but Ben asked me to stay with him to keep him company. When they all left, I noticed that he started staring at my boobs. I started to feel uncomfortable and pretend to use my arms to distract them a bit. He then all of a sudden asked me if my boobs are real. I was stunned by the question but answered him ‘yes’. He said that his friends believed in all those rumors about my boobs, so he has a bet with them to prove them wrong. But in order to do that, he wants to know if I can show him my boobs. I was so shocked by that request that I did not know how to respond. He pleaded and being me, having such a huge crush on him, I agreed to do it. I got really nervous, but I let him strip me down, and soon, I was topless in front of him. By now I was already shaking, but I can see that he was definitely enjoying it. I asked if I can put my clothes back on and he said he has to do one more test. Then he took his hands and started squeezing my breasts and playing with my nipples. I started to feel tingly and wet below and let out a loud moan. Before I could do anything he suddenly pressed his mouth to one of my breasts and started to suck on it. And then we just ended up making out. All of a sudden, his friends popped in and shouted “SO THEY ARE REAL TITS.” They were watching the whole thing all along through the slit of the door. I was so embarrassed. Not only did they see me all naked, but they saw us making out. |
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Bladder Disaster |
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A few days ago, i was in science class with the teacher who would not allow students to go to the toilet as it "causes distractions to her lessons". Apparently, that morning i had been super thirsty and drunk practically a litre of drinks.
As the lesson started, i didnt feel like going to the toilet, but after half an hour, i suddenly felt like i was going to explode. I immediately asked if i could go to the toilet as it was URGENT, but as usual, she said that i had to hold it for the ext one hour and go AFTER her class.
As i had no choice, i went back to my seat, which happened to be at the back of the class. About two minutes later, i suddenly felt like i couldn't hold it in any longer, i just sat at my seat while it all came out. I tried not to move as i peed in my uniform, the pee collecting in my seat. When it finally stopped, i had to sit in my seat of pee as the lesson continued because i was too afraid of anyone finding out.
Then it started to drip down my legs and into my shoes and i tried to stop the flow of my pee with my hands but it just made it worse. Soon my shoes were full of my pee and my legs were wet with pee. As the class was ending soon, i was desperate to clean the seat up before anyone saw it. I had no cloths or anything of the sort, so i finally decided on using my bra to clean it, i had to squirm around to get it off and when i was done cleaning it, i had to practically throw it away, even after that the seat was still wet and i only had 5 minutes left. I quickly pretended that i was slipping down my chair and tried not to think about it as my uniform soaked up the pee.
I had to wear my pee-soaked uniform for the rest of the day and i had to wear my pee-soaked panties and bra. And when i got home, my vagina was all red from absorbing my pee. |
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The Dare |
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All I had to do was to not shave my crotch for 6 months and i got $100 from sarah. As simple as that, but it all went wrong. After netball prctice, we went to shower room to shower. After showering, i walked out naked to get in th locker room. One of the girls there shouted:" Valerie got a bush." I looked down and tried my best to cover my crotch. A group of girls crowded around me. I explained on keeping my crotch so hairy. All of them dared me to run back home naked, or they would tell the entire school about my crotch. I immediately agreed and ran out of the locker room heading home.At that time there was nobody in school, i ran through the corridor out to the front door of the school door. As my house was far away, i cut through parks. Many people were looking at me, with my breasts bouncing around and my hairy crotch feeling the strong breeze. Once i reached my house, i entered by the back door not letting anyone see me. As i entered my room, my sister caught me naked. I explained everything to her. She told me to stop the dare. She helped me wax my crotch and told me to stop accepting dares. From that day onwards i stopped accepting dares. |
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The Dare |
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All I had to do was to not shave my crotch for 6 months and i got $100 from sarah. As simple as that, but it all went wrong. After netball prctice, we went to shower room to shower. After showering, i walked out naked to get in th locker room. One of the girls there shouted:" Valerie got a bush." I looked down and tried my best to cover my crotch. A group of girls crowded around me. I explained on keeping my crotch so hairy. All of them dared me to run back home naked, or they would tell the entire school about my crotch. I immediately agreed and ran out of the locker room heading home.At that time there was nobody in school, i ran through the corridor out to the front door of the school door. As my house was far away, i cut through parks. Many people were looking at me, with my breasts bouncing around and my hairy crotch feeling the strong breeze. Once i reached my house, i entered by the back door not letting anyone see me. As i entered my room, my sister caught me naked. I explained everything to her. She told me to stop the dare. She helped me wax my crotch and told me to stop accepting dares. From that day onwards i stopped accepting dares. |
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The Hot Tub |
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It was a hot Saturday evening and I was invited by my girlfriend's sister Anne to her friends for a dip in their hot tub.
My girlfriend was away on a camp and I was staying at her place for a few days.
I went to get ready to go and realised I didnt have any bathers, but since it was so hot i decided my boxer briefs would have to do.
We arrived and Anne ran over to the hot tub and got in with her mates Kara and Angela. I went inside to watch some TV.
I then heard Angela call, "Steve, come join us!". So i stipped down to my boxer briefs and walked outside.
"Sorry, i forgot my bathers." i said as i lowered myself in. As soon as my pelvis hit the warm water I needed to pee so i quickly got out and yelled back, "Just going to the loo!"
As i walked back to the tub Kara said in astonishment, "Jesus, Mary, and Joseph, will you look at that willy!"
My boxer briefs were clinging to my 7 inch softy and making a VERY good outline.
"Well it is kind of cold out here," I said jokingly.
"Cold!?!" Kara exclaimed. "It could be a thousand degrees and my boyfriends cock wouldn't be half that size."
"Looks like my sister was telling the truth about him being hung like a horse." said Anne, her eyes fixated on my crotch.
As i went to get back in i noticed that non of them were wearing their bikini tops, but their breasts were covered by the bubbly water.
"Not so fast." Anne said abruptly. "Take off those undies first. You have to go with the dress code"
I peeled my wet boxer briefs off without argument as Anne and Kara both gasped wide-eyed.
"I've got to measure that thing." Anne said as I stepped into the hot tub. She hopped out, and scurried inside, her large breasts bouncing low on her chest with each step.
I was more at easy with my manhood hidden under the bubbles.
"Alright you." Anne was back, and she was holding a thirty centimetre ruler. "We're going to get a proper measurement."
I obliged and let Anne take her measurement. Handling my member far more than was necessary, Anne grasped my cock with one hand and held the ruler to it with the other. Her hands on my cock sent a shudder trough my body.
"Almost eight inches!" She exclaimed. "Soft!" She gave my cock a squeeze to accentuate the point.
I quickly sat back under the bubbles as I knew my cock was getting harder.
"Sarah's a lucky girl" exclaimed Angela, who thankfully was a lesbian.
My cock was now at full mast and the tip was just out of the water. Hoping no-one saw, I went to sit lower in the water when Kara yelled, "What was that!?"
"I think someone is excited." giggled Anne "Let's see"
"Well if you want to see, I'll have to by fully hard. It would help if I saw Kara's tits." I said, even though I knew i was fully hard.
Hearing this, Kara immediately sat up exposing her glorious full tits. This made my cock even harder. I sat up on the edge of the hot tub and grasped the base of my cock to accentuate th thickness. My thumb and middle finger dared not touch.
"Oh my God! That thing is HUGE!" exclaimed Kara. Anne once again grabbed the ruler and measured. "Ten and a half inches..." she said in suprise.
"Oh i cant take it!" said Kara as she came over like a shit and grabbed my cock with both hands and started to pump it. "I ccould fit 3 hands on this thing!" she said in amazement.
Seeing Kara holding my cock, pumping away with her voluptuous breasts bouncing away almost made me come instantly. But I held off.
"Hey leave some for me!" yelled Anne. Se came over and added a third hand and started to suck the head, as that was all she could fit in her mouth. This was unbelievable.
I was getting a blowjob from my girlfriend's sister and a handjob from her friend. Simultaneously!
They kept pumping and licking, both having a go and then I exploded a fountain of cum onto their tits.
I collapsed, exhausted on the side of the hot tub.
I then came out to |
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Always shave your beaver.... |
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My friends always asked me to shave my beaver but i dont as i am to lazy. I was in a rush in the morning as i was late for school, i i quickly put on some clothes but without any panties not even a thong. i was wearing a skirt as usual. As i quickly ran into school, i managed to be on time. The first class was gym and we went to the girls room to change. I took out my shorts and started to take off my skirt. At this moment all the girls were looking at me. I look back at the not suspected anything. I heard laughs and giggles. Than , my best friend Nicole and whispered in my ear that everybody was staring my bush. I looked down in horror at my bush. Some of the girl to carried me out of the girls room to the hall. I was left half naked on the floor everyone croweded around me laughing at me. I tried to cover my crotch but it was not helping. I quickly ran back in the girls room put on my clothes and left school with my face red. The next day i shaved my beaver and never had such a hairy crotch again. |
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It pays when you dont where any underwear |
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Well i always dont where any underwear during basketball training which always ahd a bulge at the front. Nobody in the team knew i went commando until thursday. We were about to finish training ending of with a game. The cheerleading squad of our team were also practicing in the gym. I as usual did not wear any underwear. John was about to take shot. I jumped as high as i could to block him off. All of a sudden i felt a huge tug on my pants. Upon reaching the ground, i saw my pants on the ground. My worst nightmare had came true, i was being pantsed in public and my penis was showing.I immediately covered my penis. This followed by the laughing of the cheerleading girls behind the basket who had seen the entire incident. I quickly ran tothe direction of the boys room covering my penis. From that day onwards i always wore boxers during basketball. |
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Big Boy |
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It was after volleyball training. Everyone had gone home and i had just finished me shower. I remembered i had forgotten my shoes in the gym, so i thought since there was no one around, i'd just go grab them in my towel. As i came around the corner, i bumped into the girl who i knew had a crush on me. I apologised, and just as i did, my towel fell to the floor leaving me 7 inch flaccid penis in all its glory. As i went to grab my towel, she said "Wait, I've never seen a penis that big before..." with a shocked look on her face. When she said that, my member decided to stand to attention. Now i was standing in all my 10 inches of glory. She walked towards me, grabbed my hand and lead me back into the locker room. She sat me down and asked, "Can i touch it?", but before i could say anything she had placed her small hand on the base, then her second hand on top of it. "I could still fit 3 more of may hands on it" she exclaimed. Just as she said this, 2 more girls came in. I was SO embarrased. They were all amazed and all had a hold and a stroke. My engorged member throbbed with all the attention. They noticed and then each preceded to give me a handjob untill i came. When they were done they left me and my mess and i had to have another shower.
Now i'm known around school as 'horse man'
Very embarrassing. |
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Naughty Pictures |
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My husband likes to take nude pictures of me. I like it too, I get to buy new clothes, shoes, toys, etc.
I told my GF about our fun and she said he going to show them to his friends. I said no way. Guess what?
Two months ago he admitted that he has been showing me off to his unmarried cousin for years. He told me that cousin lives for my pictures and basically made me feel good about the deal.
I thought about it alot and figured why should the boys have all the fun.
Last month I sugested we all look at them together. After a little wine hubby plugged the camera to the TV and the show began. I was of course embarassed, some poses are very explicit. After only a half hour I dragged hubby upstairs and cousin ran home to do his thing.
I think I enjoyed a little too much. It's a regular party now. While viewing a particularly open shot,I sugested the boys whip it out for me to enjoy.
Let them be red faced too. Two giggly guys with their things out, quite a sight.
I tell my bestfriend every thing but I'm thinking she's going to think I went pervert on her.
I even fantasize of some other male friends coming to the party. For now everyone is happy.
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"Stiffie" |
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Ok so basicly this is a story from highschool, we were sitting at lunch and just chiling when suddenly this female teacher bursts into the the caffeteria crying, and get this, after her runs in our Physics teacher with ripped pats and a stiffie sticking out of it. Later on we found out that the pants were ripped 'cause they got caught on a nail somewhere after she spilled coffee on him =)) |
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GIVE ME AN "E" for Embarrassing!!! |
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My name is Barry. Last year for Halloween, my ex-girlfriend Brittany asked me to go to a costume party with her. She said she would take care of my costume, so I let her. That was a mistake! On the day of the party, I arrived at Brittany's house to find out that she and her roommate Sara had decided that I would go as a cheerleader. At first I was hesitant but they thought it would be lots of fun, so I agreed to it. That was also a mistake! Then...Brittany pulls out this panty and told me that I had to wear it under my cheerleading skirt. It was a string-bikini panty...Brittany said she wanted to get me a brief but she could only find the right color to match my cheerleading uniform in the string-bikini style of panty. After some pleading on their part...I reluctantly agreed to wear it. That was a big mistake! I put on my costume and was somewhat shocked to discover that the skirt was incredibly short. I was even more shocked to discover that those string-bikini panties would "ride-up" on me after just a few steps and get pretty cheeky. I knew it was gonna be an embarrassing evening but I decided I would just have fun with it. When Brittany, Sara, and I got to the party...I was blushing. Brittany then tells me that she signed me up to participate in the bobbing for apples game. I was the first one up and I bent over the tub of water without even thinking. I heard lots of laughing and figured that people were laughing because I was having a hard time getting an apple. After about one minute, Sara yells out, "hey Barry, we really love those cute little panties!" I stood up immediately and grabbed my butt. I suddenly realized that I had been giving everyone a free panty show in my cheeky panties. I just stood there for a second with my mouth wide open...totally dumb-founded. The room erupted with laughter and I just blushed and started laughing too. I was soooo mortified that I had to walk out of the room for awhile. To this day, I still have a few girls that will ask me about my panties everytime they see me. It is so totally embarrassing. YIKES!!!
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2 Light Bulbs |
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I was 14 at the time of the story.
One afternoon when I was home my neighbor came and ask me if I could help her change the light bulb in her kitchen. Casing for the light was kinda big and out of 3 screws one of the screws were stuck. Since we couldnt let go of the casing hanging for just one screw I climbed on the ladder to hold it until she went to get something to remove the screw. I was wearing a loose short that day and being at home, wearing nothing underneath. I was on the ladder with one leg much higher than the other b/c it was easier to hold. She came back with a screw and with a smile on the face while looking toward my crotch said "oh oh.. I see 2 light bulbs..". I knew exactly what she meant and instantly put my leg down to a lower level and tucked my package back into it's place while still holding the casing with one hand. But my embarrassment wasnt over as I felt starting an erection. By the time I took off the screw I had a tent. She probably felt embarrassed too b/c of this and said it's ok and it's normal and she'll forget that anything ever happened.. |
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Party Fun |
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Last week, I went to a friends party. My friends and I were browsing through the host's PC and there were a picture of a very hot girl. We were a bit drunk and we began to talk about calling the girl and paying her for sex. There was a boy near us and we told him to "come and see the girl! Isn't she hot! Let's gather money to pay and have sex with her. Join us!". He smiled and continued listening to us. After a few minutes the sister of that boy came in and when she saw us, she told us "OO, do you like my pictures?". Her brother was grinning and then asked us "So, what did you want to do?"
WE WERE SOOO ASHAMED! |
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fanny fart |
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Once while my boyfriend was going down on me I let out a fanny fart! He looked up and was really confused and I was soooooo embarrassed! |
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blowjob revenge |
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After reading someone's story about vomiting on a guy's crotch I thought I would write my own blowjob story. I was on a date with this guy and things were getting hot and heavy when he started pushing my head down. I tried to push back against his hand but he was stronger than me. I obviously didn't want to do it but since he pushed me I got a little annoyed and so, instead of sucking him I bit his penis. It wasn't enough to really hurt him but it hurt. Power to the women! |
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First BJ |
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This is a little embarrassing but the first time I gave a guy a blowjob I ended up puking on him because I wasn't used to it. I was mortified and I've never seen him since... |
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Adult Anecdotes (18+ only) 
